


Synopsis: Ransom of Richard Redstone

by dairesfanficrefuge_archivist



Category: Highlander: The Series
Genre: Meta, Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-12-31
Updated: 2003-12-31
Packaged: 2018-12-18 07:04:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11869110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dairesfanficrefuge_archivist/pseuds/dairesfanficrefuge_archivist
Summary: Note from Daire, the archivist: this story was originally archived atDaire's Fanfic Refuge. Deciding to give the stories a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address onDaire's Fanfic Refuge's collection profile.





	Synopsis: Ransom of Richard Redstone

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Daire, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Daire's Fanfic Refuge](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Daire%27s_Fanfic_Refuge). Deciding to give the stories a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Daire's Fanfic Refuge's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/dairesfanficrefuge/profile).

Ransom of Richard Redstone

**RANSOM OF RICHARD REDSTONE**

Sigh! Not all episodes are wonderful-some are excellent, some merely good. This one is cute but (IMNSHO), painfully...excruciatingly... DUMB! 

It's a Mac/Richie thing, no swordfights, no other Immortals, just a sweet, delicate, French pastry of an episode. It's the light dessert after that heavy meal of the Horsemen. (Burp!) 

_New Characters:_

**BARON LEMARTIN** \- used to run a casino that Mac frequented in 1978, lost it to Carlo Capodimonte, is now impoverished-except for the château he shares with his granddaughter. 

**MARINA LEMARTIN** \- his granddaughter, faced with the prospect of foreclosure on her family's estate (Château LeMartin), unless she buys it with her 'honor.' 

**CARLO CAPODIMONTE** \- present owner of the casino as well as the mortgage on the Château LeMartin. Mac knows firsthand where Carlo got the money to buy the casino and will enjoy righting that wrong. 

**DESIREE** \- MacLeod's girlfriend who won a bundle in the casino in 1978. 

**EDWARD CERVAIN** \- talentless artist, kept from starvation by the generosity of the LeMartins, Marina's 'partner-in-crime.' 

**JAMES FOULARD** \- car dealer, only wants his red Ferrari back. 

**JAMES BOND?** \- Nah! Couldn't be! 

* * *

Present Day   
French Country Road, Outside Paris 

With a mischievous wave-   
Of a magical wand.   
'Highlander' has morphed-   
Into vintage 'James Bond,'   
Double-o-seven's music,   
Two snazzy cars race,   
Through curving back roads-   
At a daredevil's pace. 

The Ferrari's bright red,   
The Porsche gleams black,   
They vie for position,   
Neither driver holds back,   
Till a lumbering junker-   
Driven by an old coot-   
Forces the Porsche-   
To abandon pursuit. 

The Casino Montecour 

The Ferrari's arrived-   
At its destination,   
Its driver emerges-   
For examination,   
Polished black shoes,   
A tuxedo-expensive,   
Silk scarf and dress shirt,   
His funds seem extensive. 

Except for his face-   
That tells us he's lyin'-   
Because it belongs-   
To our own Richie Ryan!   
As the black Porsche pulls in,   
Rich feels obligated-   
To acknowledge the loser-   
So she won't feel deflated. 

'Don't feel bad,' he grins,   
'I'm a pro,' (such finesse),   
The glamorous driver-   
Conceals her 'distress,'   
As Richie walks off-   
With a confident smirk,   
She: 'Really? I thought-   
You were just a plain jerk!' 

Paris Street 

Apr's-shopping surprise!   
Mac sees with dismay-   
His car's on the hook,   
To be towed away,   
'What's going on?   
What's this about?'   
An indignant Foulard-   
Makes sure he finds out. 

'You'll get your car-   
When I get MINE back,   
I want my Ferrari!'   
He bellows at Mac,   
Mac parries, 'That's not-   
A Ferrari! Unhook it!'   
'No! Take it away!'   
Foulard just retook it. 

To Mac, he reports-   
'Your name and address-   
Were left as security!'   
Great, what a mess!   
'An American, young-   
Drove it out for a test-   
He never returned it.'   
MacLeod's unimpressed. 

'Not enough proof!   
Unhook it!' He fires,   
Then Foulard produces-   
The proof he requires,   
A passport...upon it-   
Richie's cherubic face,   
The name-'Richard Redstone',   
Birthdate and place. 

'Oh,' says MacLeod,   
Now Foulard looks smug,   
Mac fakes, 'Red Richovich,   
Everyone knows this mug,   
'Redstone' is an alias,   
Russian hitman, a whiz,   
All Europe wants him...   
And _you_ know where he _is?_ ' 

The Casino Montecour 

The 'Mafia hitman'-   
At this moment is winning-   
A great sum of money-   
And he's just beginning,   
He's impressed all the women-   
With his obvious prosperity,   
Combined with good looks-   
And charming sincerity. 

He's observed by another-   
Who's eye's like a hawk's,   
One Edward Cervain...   
As a waiter, he stalks,   
Unnoticed, he mingles-   
Till he senses a prey,   
It appears, Richard Redstone-   
Is his target today. 

He points Redstone out-   
As a potential prize-   
To Marina LeMartin-   
She will make goo-goo eyes-   
At Redstone, to see-   
If he's worth pursuing,   
What nefarious deed-   
Does this pair plan on doing? 

Paris Street 

'I hope,' cautions Mac-   
That you have good insurance,   
What they do to informants....   
(You have my assurance),   
Is not very pleasant...   
Fish hooks in your nose,   
Leeches...the rest-   
To obscene to disclose.' 

The Casino Montecour 

Mr. Redstone's good luck-   
Refuses to cease,   
Each time he wagers-   
His winnings increase,   
'This calls for champagne!'   
Marina makes sure-   
That she will be jostled-   
By her victim du jour. 

His apology's accepted,   
'No harm was done,'   
But being a millionaire-   
Is so much fun...   
Before they conclude-   
Their light badinage-   
His company provides him-   
A jet-a Mirage! 

He cannot tell-   
But she has just pointed-   
To Edward-who'll see-   
Redstone's drink is anointed,   
A packet of powder-   
Emptied in his champagne-   
Soon Redstone's small loss-   
Will be their large gain. 

Paris Street 

Mac's had 'second thoughts',   
'Go ahead, take the car,'   
Foulard pictures the Mafia's-   
Entire repertoire,   
No tortures for him,   
'Unhook it, I say,'   
He escapes with relief-   
Wishing Mac a 'nice day.' 

Mac's mirth soon transforms-   
To a more serious vein,   
'Red Richovich/Redstone-   
Is at it again,   
Now Mac's annoyance-   
Coalesces to ire-   
There is no air-   
In his rear tire. 

The Casino Montecour 

Mr. Redstone's the owner,   
'Match-Tech Corporation,   
(Inspired by a matchbook-   
Plus imagination),   
He drinks his champagne,   
Continues his spiel,   
When he's asked for his wager-   
On the roulette wheel. 

'Let it all ride on black!'   
But the ball prefers red,   
'Easy come, easy go,'   
Uncomfortably said,   
Now he feels giddy,   
Fresh air-to revive him...   
Marina's suggestion,   
She offers to drive him. 

Roadside 

Mr. Redstone's decidedly-   
Indisposed...groggy,   
He wakes for a moment,   
Speech slurring, brain foggy,   
But his instincts die hard,   
It's a gentleman's duty-   
Even half-comatose-   
He'll grab for this beauty. 

She escapes his wet kiss,   
His body flops rubbery,   
Edward now joins them,   
(He hid in the shrubbery),   
'How much did you give him?'   
He answers, 'One dose...   
I followed the farmer's-   
Directions real close.' 

'That farmer, he told you-   
The dose for a horse,'   
Mr. Redstone lies mute-   
Not up for discourse,   
He does mumble something...   
Like, 'Where are we going?'   
'My place,' says Marina,   
Little movement, he's showing. 

Except...as he sleeps-   
One hand he has pressed-   
Firmly, possessively-   
On the mademoiselle's breast,   
Sneers Edward, 'Americans-   
All have this obsession,'   
She rebuts, 'We've a millionaire-   
In our possession.' 

Château LeMartin 

When the 'millionaire' comes to-   
He is chained to a bed,   
Both wrists handcuffed,   
An ache in his head,   
She offers him water...   
A blanket? No go!   
She's insulted, his room's-   
'The best in the château.' 

'Sweetheart!' Protesting,   
'You kidnapped me!'   
'Please, do not yell,'   
She pouts pitifully,   
'All that we need-   
Is 200,000 Francs,   
Then we'll pay our bills,   
And you'll have our thanks.' 

'My grandfather needs it-   
To pay back a loan,   
If we don't repay it-   
This château we now own-   
Will be taken away.'   
'Marina, I'm sorry-   
But this will not work,'   
(Damn that Ferrari!) 

She gets up to leave,   
No lenience she'll show,   
'Marina...please...wait-   
I gotta go!'   
'When you have the money!'   
'Oh no, no...no...NO!   
You don't understand...   
I gotta GO!' 

Outside the Casino 

Duncan drives up,   
(How did he detect-   
The one place in France-   
That Rich would select?)   
Richie's attracted-   
Like a bee is to honey-   
To places that feature-   
Both women and money. 

Mac takes a moment-   
For cosmetic art,   
He was here in the 70's,   
He must look the part,   
Cotton puffs up his jowls,   
Some gray in his hair,   
A cane to assist him,   
Now he'll revisit there. 

Flashback, Casino Montecour, France 1978 

They're swankily dressed,   
A treat to the eye,   
Desiree in her gown,   
Mac's silly bow tie,   
They are dancing with joy,   
Anticipating-   
Gambling and fun-   
'The tables are waiting.' 

But Mac's opponent-   
Is a man...call him 'James,'   
At blackjack, he's expert-   
(And some other games),   
Mac's losing badly,   
Would a drink be preferred?   
'James' likes martinis,   
'Shaken, not stirred.' 

To Desiree, Mac whispers-   
'He probably won't know-   
The difference,' but off-   
For the drinks he will go,   
When he returns,   
Desiree took his place,   
She's won a small fortune,   
And a smile lights her face. 

'James, ' unperturbed-   
Doesn't seem awfully crushed,   
Desiree's chips piled high   
With excitement, she's flushed,   
'Can you _believe_ it?   
The first time I've played?'   
But Carlo is watching,   
Annoyed and dismayed. 

To Baron LeMartin-   
Whispers Carlo, (the louse),   
'What's happening here-   
Isn't good for the house.'   
The good natured baron-   
Chides, 'Carlo, don't grouse,   
When a beauty is happy,   
It's good for the house.' 

'Should I keep playing?'   
(In MacLeod's ear, aside),   
Mac and 'James' exchange looks,   
Mac suggests, 'Let it ride,'   
He and Desiree kiss,   
The hand's played... and then-   
Desiree squeals!   
'I've won AGAIN!' 

Now she will stop,   
But, the lady is rash,   
She'll take all her winnings...   
'Right now! In cash!'   
Carlo turns purple,   
'One million Francs?'   
A prodigious amount,   
Hasn't she heard of banks? 

But MacLeod and the lady-   
Are giggling and bubbling,   
Matters of security-   
To them, are not troubling,   
They're off to their room-   
To enjoy other 'games,'   
'That man is lucky,'   
The baron exclaims. 

Casino Montecour, Present Day 

MacLeod enters slowly,   
With the 'aid' of his cane,   
There's Carlo, (now owner),   
'Glad to see you again,'   
They exchange pleasantries,   
'Where's the baron?' asks Mac,   
'Oh, the poor man went daft-   
Quite a while back,' 

'I own the place now,   
One does what one can,'   
'A shame,' says MacLeod,   
'He was a good man,'   
MacLeod describes Richie-   
And the car, 'Was he here?'   
Carlo asks the attendant,   
Whose memory is clear. 

'He left yesterday,   
Accompanied by-   
Mlle. LeMartin.'   
Mac must clarify...   
'The baron's granddaughter??   
How old could she be??'   
'Old enough,' Carlos snaps,   
Showing his jealousy. 

Château LeMartin 

Mr. Redstone excreted-   
In a large chamber pot,   
Now Edward must dump it,   
Overjoyed, he is not.   
'Three years at the Sorbonne,   
To carry offal,   
'I loathe this!' he snarls,   
'Feeling's mutual, pal.' 

Marina's upset-   
That her hostage won't eat,   
'My grandfather cooked this,'   
He'll pass on the treat,   
'There must be another-   
Way out of your mess,'   
Richard Redstone can't bear-   
A lady's distress. 

'You have everything!   
How can you know-   
What it's like to have nothing?'   
(Oops! A low blow).   
He asks, 'Can't you change-   
The terms of your loan?'   
'There is only one thing-   
That pig wants to own.' 

'Only one way-   
He'll forgive what we owe,   
If I marry him,'   
Thinks Redstone, oh no,   
'That's why you snatched me?'   
'It was Edward's contrivance,'   
Says Redstone, 'Your boyfriend-   
Has criminal connivance.' 

'He's a painter, not boyfriend,   
With artistic propensities,   
My family's supported-   
Poor artists for centuries,   
Monet painted here-   
A canvas or two,'   
'Then why can't your Rembrandt-   
Sell a few works for you?' 

'He's not very good,'   
Then Redstone fires back...   
'So he's not just a crook,   
He's a sponge and a hack!'   
But he now tastes the food,   
With a kiss canapé,   
'If you uncuff one wrist,   
I promise to stay.' 

As they smooch, a black car-   
Arrives at the portal,   
Mr. Redstone detects-   
Another Immortal,   
'Marina! Unlock me!'   
Mr. Redstone beseeches,   
'You must let me go-   
There's no time for speeches!' 

'You promised!' She won't-   
Unfetter her payday,   
But Redstone now howls-   
A passionate MAYDAY,   
'Marina, I'll die,   
We could all be deleted,'   
In his panic, he grabs-   
Where the key's been secreted! 

Deep in her bosom!   
All he gets is a smack!   
'You're a pig and a liar!'   
Her verbal attack,   
Now she stomps out,   
He's chained and defenseless-   
At an Immortal's mercy-   
Dying this way is senseless. 

But our Mr. Redstone-   
Is cunning and strong,   
He yanks at the bedpost-   
And before very long-   
The whole frame collapses,   
Only pieces exist-   
But the bedpost is still-   
Chained to his wrist. 

He climbs past the window,   
Still attached to his post,   
The baron can't see him,   
(He's preparing his roast),   
Outside his heart soars,   
It's MacLeod, feeling punny,   
'Are you the postman?'   
To Rich, it's not funny. 

'You're supposed to be dead-   
Why are you in France?'   
'Got a brand new ID,   
Thought I'd take a chance,'   
'Yeah, Richie Redstone,   
Steals cars for glory,'   
Then Rich fills him in-   
On the sad, sordid story. 

Inside, the baron-   
(A lovable old sort)   
Asks, 'How's Mr. Flintstone?'   
He'd like a report,   
'Redstone' she corrects,   
But Edward is hissing-   
No word in the papers-   
That a millionaire's missing. 

While inside they wonder,   
Is Redstone a fake?   
Richie tells Mac-   
How much it will take,   
'200,000 Francs,   
Mac, buddy,' says Rich,   
'You gotta help me,'   
Richie's usual pitch. 

'Are you sure there are no-   
Other thoughts on your mind?   
Thoughts,' teases Mac...   
'Of a romantic kind?'   
Rich admits, 'Yeah, a little-   
But I want to assist...   
I'd better go back-   
Before I am missed.' 

'GONE!!!' They have noticed!   
Mac shoos Rich away,   
Rich trusts that his 'buddy'-   
Will help save the day,   
Now to climb back!   
With the bedpost, it's hard,   
So, Rich rings the bell-   
To catch them off guard. 

The police! They are sure-   
That they're under arrest!   
Edward opens the door,   
Primed for the inquest,   
Mr. Redstone and bedpost-   
Are embarrassed that they-   
Were in search of a john-   
And they lost their way. 

Enter Mr. Redstone,   
'Sorry I broke your bed,'   
Edward answers by smashing-   
A vase on his head,   
Mr. Redstone revives-   
In the wine cellar...chained-   
To a wine rack this time,   
(He's been kept entertained). 

'You ruined the bed...   
Now the wine cellar, too...   
What kind of a guest...'   
(Asks Marina), 'are _you?_ '   
'Guest? I was kidnapped!!   
Twice!!' 'But well-treated...'   
Now Rich must confess-   
How he lied and he cheated. 

'I have no money,   
I was kidding, just playing,'   
They look appalled,   
What is he saying?   
Is he a poor shlump,   
His wealth a mere sham-   
Or a real millionaire-   
Miserly as a clam? 

Their bickering stops-   
Someone's at the door,   
While Edward is gone-   
Rich tries an encore-   
Just one more kiss,   
But it's no surprise-   
He again rates a slap,   
(One would think he'd get wise). 

At the door-a bespectacled-   
Duncan MacLeod,   
Efficient and businesslike-   
Head slightly bowed,   
'I'm the CEO,   
Match-Tech Corporation,   
I have Mr. Redstone's-   
Authorization.' 

'Marina LeMartin-   
Is the name on this check'   
Marina's come out-   
And is craning her neck-   
'200,000 Francs!   
How very generous,'   
'He well can afford it,   
His fortune is plenteous.' 

MacLeod looks about-   
'This château is well-   
Suited to be-   
A first class hotel,   
Mr. Redstone might like-   
A chance to invest.   
May I speak with him?'   
(A reasonable request). 

'He's sleeping!' 'He's not here!'   
'He's not here!' 'He's sleeping!'   
Can't get it together,   
(Nice rhythm they're keeping).   
They finally say...   
'He's not here!' as one,   
Shutting the door,   
Chuckles Mac, 'This is fun.' 

Marina comes down-   
Uncuffs Richie's wrists,   
Then gives him a kiss-   
That probes and persists,   
'That one's for saving me,'   
SMACK!! 'That's for lying,'   
Three hard smacks so far,   
And he's not even trying. 

Casino Montecour Office 

Carlo seems indifferent-   
As Rich and Marina-   
Hand over the check-   
But he couldn't be meaner,   
'Don't want it,' he says,   
'It is one day too late,   
Yesterday was your deadline-   
To keep the estate.' 

'It might be for sale,'   
His words clipped precisely,   
'For ten million Francs-   
That sum would do nicely,'   
'But I don't have it!'   
She wails her despair,   
'Then ask Mr. Redstone-   
Your nice millionaire.' 

Outside the Château, Later 

Rich appeals to...who else?   
What's a Highlander for...   
If not to help 'buddies,'   
More so, if they're poor?   
'Over _two million dollars?_   
You're delusionary,   
And Rich-you still owe-   
Someone a Ferrari!' 

'What,' Rich persists-   
Do you want me to tell her?'   
His record so far-   
Has been less than stellar,   
'How about the truth?   
Something new,' suggests Mac,   
Rich groans, he's convinced-   
That will earn one more smack! 

Château LeMartin's Kitchen 

Rich bites the bullet,   
'I'm not a big shot!'   
Edward whines-'And I even-   
Carried his chamber pot!'   
Marina regrets-   
Having caused such unrest,   
The baron's forgiving-   
But he has one request. 

'Edward, please paint-   
A picture for me-   
Of this château,   
One last memory,'   
Edward is sullen,   
He'll need a new canvas,   
Says Rich, 'In the bedroom-   
There are dozens, en masse.' 

'They were rolled up-   
In the top of the bed,'   
Everyone's ears perk up-   
At what Rich has said,   
To the bedroom they swarm,   
Seizing, unrolling,   
Edward pictures their contents,   
Their value extolling. 

'Cézannes or Degas',   
Picassos,' my guess,   
Says MacLeod –'All supported-   
By LeMartin largesse,   
Adds the baron, 'I believe-   
Van Gogh stayed here once!'   
He unrolls a large canvas-   
It's the work of a dunce. 

Mac too, unfolds one-   
An unfortunate gesture,   
It's supposed to be him!   
'Painted by your ancestor-   
Albert LeMartin,   
I'm sorry, but he-   
Was lacking in talent,'   
Says Marina, 'Plan B.' 

'Not Capodimonte!   
Not that lizard, NO!   
Pleads the baron to Marina-   
'Let him have the château!   
Keep your honor intact,'   
Richie seconds the motion,   
To Marina he whispers-   
His growing devotion. 

Outside the Château, Later 

Marina's all packed,   
She waits at the gate-   
For Carlo's arrival,   
Traumatized by her fate,   
Mac walks up behind her,   
Urging gently, 'Don't go,   
The price is too high-   
Even for the château.' 

'And what about Richard?'   
'He'll forget me in time,'   
'And will you forget _him?_ '   
But...here comes the slime.   
Carlo Capodimonte-   
Has come for his prize,   
She crawls in the car,   
Sadly lowering her eyes. 

'Don't do this, Carlo,'   
Mac begs from his heart,   
But Carlo's off schedule-   
And he must depart,   
A glance at his watch,   
Mac looks at it, too...   
He remembers that watch-   
Since the time it was new. 

Flashback, Hotel Room, France, 1978 

Desiree has engaged-   
The room most expensive,   
She and Duncan have plans-   
For wild and intensive-   
Love play and passion-   
Amidst the great stash-   
Of one million Francs-   
In nice piles of cash. 

She's delighted! For once-   
_She's_ the one with the money,   
He hasn't a centime-   
To offer his honey,   
Only his watch,   
Will mercy be shown?   
'I'm very expensive,'   
'I'll take out a loan.' 

Her sequined red dress-   
Soon falls unzipped,   
Though Mac's short of money-   
He comes well equipped,   
They warm to their game...   
'Who does what to whom?'   
But a thug, in a ski mask-   
Bursts in the room! 

'Did you order room service?'   
(Not funny, Dunkie)   
The thief holds a gun,   
But Desiree's still spunky,   
Give up her money???   
'Never!' she swears,   
The crook says, 'I'll shoot him!'   
She: 'Think that he cares?' 

'I care,' says MacLeod,   
To her, he'll implore-   
'A million Francs isn't-   
Worth dying for.'   
He stands in his skivvies,   
Holding the bag,   
Makes her stuff it full-   
With ill-gotten swag. 

'Take it!' he says-   
But the thief's eye's now drawn-   
To the watch! 'NOT THE WATCH!'   
But that too, is gone,   
When the thief finally splits-   
Leaving her melancholic-   
Desiree's too upset-   
To continue their frolic. 

Present Day, Outside the Château 

MacLeod says goodbye-   
To Marina and Carlo,   
She sits motionless,   
Like baggage or cargo,   
But Mac has new hope,   
That watch stirred him so,   
Ignoring his cane-   
Striding toward the château. 

Château Kitchen 

The baron is morose-   
Convinced he's to blame-   
Tries losing himself-   
In a Solitaire game,   
Edward and Richie,   
Contentious and snappy...   
They all miss Marina,   
Nobody's happy. 

Only Duncan seems hopeful-   
Asks the baron...Does he know-   
How Capodimonte-   
Procured the casino?   
'He acquired a fortune-   
Nineteen years, it has been'   
Mac grins, 'Rich, the keys-   
Let's go for a spin.' 

On the Road 

'She drugged me, kidnapped me-   
Tied me down to a bed,   
As relationships go,   
I think we're ahead...   
Whoa, Mac! Aren't you driving-   
A little too fast?'   
There's the old coot again-   
Same clunker, just passed. 

Casino Montecour Office 

Mac and Richie walk in,   
Making sure the door's locked,   
'Get out, or I'll call-   
The police!' Carlo's shocked.   
'Call them,' urges Mac,   
'Make sure they know-   
How you robbed two people-   
Nineteen years ago.' 

'One million Francs-   
At gunpoint, you took,'   
'What are you saying?'   
The bastard is shook!   
'That watch. It was mine!'   
Carlos tries being aloof,   
'It does not mean a thing-   
You haven't got proof.' 

Mac gave Rich his cane,   
Now he pulls out a gun,   
'You're right, but we're not-   
Going to try anyone,   
'No, No! Rich protests-   
Hitting Mac on the wrist,   
MacLeod drops the gun-   
Where the rat can't resist. 

Carlo picks up the gun,   
In the struggle, shoots Mac!   
'You got me,' Mac gasps-   
Then he staggers, falls back,   
'Dead!' Rich declares,   
Mac's pulse, non-existent,   
At the door, there is shouting-   
And pounding persistent. 

'I'm fine!' Carlo yells,   
To quiet his crew,   
'You killed him, ' says Rich,   
'It's prison for you,'   
Rich goes for the door,   
'No!' Carlo's protest,   
'I'll do anything-   
To avoid an arrest.' 

On the floor, MacLeod's 'corpse'-   
Cannot conceal-   
A smile-just a flicker-   
As Rich states the deal,   
'The deeds, endorsed over-   
The casino, château,   
You-to South America,   
I forget what I know.' 

Carlo screams, 'It's extortion'   
Rich heads for the door,   
MacLeod, very still-   
But awake-on the floor.   
'The deed or the cops!'   
(Freedom or subpoena),   
He signs the château-   
Over to Marina. 

'Watch!' mouths the corpse,   
(Most important detail)   
'The casino,' says Rich,   
Carlo'd rather take jail,   
'Then give me the watch,'   
Circling like a hyena,   
Rich takes it and smiles,   
'Enjoy Argentina.' 

He's gone and the corpse-   
Is reanimated,   
'How was I?' asks Mac   
'A bit overstated,'   
'I was an actor...   
Played Shakespeare's great parts,'   
'I know,' Richie thinks-   
What a loss to the arts. 

Château Kitchen 

All five share a dinner-   
The baron prepared,   
Some old and some new-   
Ideas are now aired,   
Mac thinks the château-   
Would do very well-   
If it was converted-   
Into a hotel. 

Marina would love to-   
But lacks the resources,   
Rich suggests, 'Why don't you-   
And I combine forces?   
I'm good with my hands,   
I can help keep the books...'   
Marina smiles 'yes,'   
With one of those looks. 

'Let's celebrate!'   
The baron's eyes shine!   
'I'll go to the cellar-   
For a bottle of wine,'   
Duncan trails after,   
Still leans on his cane-   
Down the stone steps-   
To the baron's domain. 

The wine cellar doesn't-   
Have much left at all,   
But Duncan's intrigued-   
By an oddly placed wall,   
'When was this built?'   
'Around World War Two.'   
Mac recalls from that time-   
What he saw people do. 

Nearby-a sledgehammer,   
Every wine cellar has one?   
Mac swings at the wall-   
Sounds loud as a shotgun-   
Bring down the others-   
Who gaze, eyes intent-   
On this middle aged businessman-   
Smashing cement. 

A treasure in wine-   
To their eyes is revealed!   
According to Mac-   
French families concealed-   
Vintage wine, from the Nazis-   
Behind walls like this,   
'Your financial troubles-   
You now may dismiss.' 

'This wine,' says the baron-   
'Looks like a winner.'   
He carries the bottle-   
In triumph, to dinner.   
'A toast,' calls the baron,   
'A toast to old friends!'   
'And _new_ ones,' adds Rich,   
So, it happily ends. 

Peace, Emit   
© 2002 

**_Under the Kilt_ from Highlander: The Official Site: **

Don Paonessa, Creative Consultant, Post Production   
"For Post, we tried to create the James Bond theme without it being the James Bond theme. I think they did it successfully." 

**Ken Gord, Producer**   
"It didn't work and I don't know why. I thought the cast was good." 

~ Duende   
  
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